so here's my second attempt at a first draft now that I've gotten more into the Bird by Bird book..

One of my very favorite memories is our old barn as a child. it was huge.. as tall as a 2 story house. I'm not sure how long it had been there by the time I was 8 but I'm guessing fairly long. The roof was still intact enough to keep several hundred bales of hay dry. But the walls were worn down and parting so that cracks were visible between some of the planks.
There was an overhang out side of the back of the barn where the cows would amble up to eat. There was a small area where you could stay inside the barn and throw them a section of the hay. The whole barn smelled of the dusty hay, dirt floor, manure from outside and the musty smell of the cows themselves. it was such a pleasant earthy smell and very comforting.

The barn was situated a good 500 ft away from any other house or building so once you were inside the huge barn doors, you felt isolated from the world. On sunny days I would escape there, and if it was near summer there would be a couple tons of hay in there. I would climb to the top and just lay there watching the dust and the hay float around in the streams of sunshine that came through some of the cracks in the walls, or through the hay window in the loft. I was totally alone but never felt lonely there. I would imagine God laying there beside me just enjoying the smells, and the streams of light. 'We' would watch the swallows darting in and out either making nests on the top rafter or feeding their babies. I was able to talk to Him easily there with no interruptions, and no feeling of pressure to be someone I wasn't.
The hay felt itchy but warm and the sounds of the birds and an occasional bee made for one of the most peaceful places I retreated to as a child.

(Well, not necessarily better.. but I did remember more details...lol)

Definitely a Sh.. first draft lol

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I’m lying on the top of a huge pile of hay-bales. There are probably over 100 bales in this old barn. I’m 8 years old and this is one of my favorite places to be alone. Even though it’s old, the roof is still sturdy with no cracks in it.. making a dry place for this hay. There is a huge doorway with a hayloft at the top. It usually is open so the sun streams through there. There is so much dust and hay in the air that the sun can catch it and create long beams in through the window.

Everything is quiet. I can’t hear any traffic, or activities at the house. Once in a while a random bee breaks the silence as it tries to find a way back outside.

The top beam is the perfect place for swallow’s nests. They dip and dive through the barn as they come and go from these nests. I could lie here and watch them all day. The cows come near the barn to eat so their smell mixes with the hay and the manure in an earthy smell that is familiar and comforting.

It was so quiet... and the sun would come through the big doorway... and make that stream in the dust...